Coneheads (film)

Coneheads
Theatrical release poster
Directed by	Steve Barron
Screenplay by	Tom Davis Dan Aykroyd Bonnie Turner Terry Turner
Based on	Coneheads sketches from Saturday Night Live by Lorne Michaels
Produced by	Lorne Michaels
Starring	Dan Aykroyd Jane Curtin
Cinematography	Francis Kenny
Edited by	Paul Trejo
Music by	David Newman
Production company	Lorne Michaels Productions
Distributed by	Paramount Pictures
Release date	July 23, 1993 (1993-07-23)
Running time	87 minutes
Country	United States
Language	English
Budget	$30 million
Box office	$21 million

Coneheads is a 1993 American science-fiction comedy film released by Paramount Pictures. It is produced by Lorne Michaels, directed by Steve Barron, and stars Dan Aykroyd, Jane Curtin, and Michelle Burke. The film is based on the NBC Saturday Night Live comedy sketches about aliens stranded on Earth, who have Anglicized their Remulakian surname "Clorhone" to "Conehead". Michelle Burke takes over the role played by Laraine Newman on SNL. The film also features roles and cameos by actors and comedians from SNL and other television series of the time, such as Michael McKean, David Spade, Michael Richards, Sinbad, Adam Sandler, Jan Hooks, Chris Farley, Jason Alexander, Phil Hartman, Drew Carey, Kevin Nealon, Julia Sweeney, Garrett Morris, Laraine Newman, Tim Meadows, Tom Arnold, and Jon Lovitz.

Three years after the release of Coneheads, screenwriters Bonnie & Terry Turner and star Jane Curtin revisited the premise of aliens arriving on Earth and assimilating into American society with the TV show 3rd Rock from the Sun, with Curtin instead playing a human character.

Coneheads, which was released before 9/11, has often been recognized as an allegorical commentary on the illegal-immigrant experience in America. The movie's storyline traces the experiences of Beldar and Prymaat, and later their native-born daughter Connie, from their humble beginnings to the point where "stability and contentment have been achieved".

Plot

In the early 1990s, an airman (Whip Hubley) is watching the Star Trek: The Original Series episode "Arena". Upon discovering a UFO in U.S. airspace, the New Jersey Air National Guard sends F-16 fighter jets to investigate. The military aircraft fire on the unresponsive starship, and cause it to crash into the Atlantic Ocean near Manhattan.

The aliens are from the planet Remulak. They are Fuel-Survey Underlord Beldar Clorhone (Dan Aykroyd), and his spouse Prymaat Clorhone (Jane Curtin). They survive aboard the crashed, massive cone-shaped starship, but must abandon it as it is sinking into the ocean.

Having been dispatched by Highmaster Mintot, Beldar's and Prymaat's assigned mission had been to examine the natural resources of Earth for possible extraction to manufacture fuel. And, if necessary, conquer the Earth for the planet Remulak, whose inhabitants Remulakians refer to in English as "bluntskulls".

Requiring immediate accommodations for the night, Beldar and Prymaat, clad in their alien uniforms, proceed to a motel. They are greeted by a polite motel clerk (Michael Richards).

For the first time, we see alien abilities on the part of Prymaat. She tilts her cone at a vending machine, and her cone-head emits blue lightning, causing the machine to spew coins of various denominations through its coin-return slot.

Prymaat salvages a momentarily-tense situation with the motel clerk by dumping several dozen dollars' worth of quarters, dimes and nickels on the counter, declaring "...we shall remunerate with metallic tender disks!" The very polite motel clerk responds "...this is fine".

Later, Beldar and Prymaat are in one of the motel's rooms. Having disassembled the television set, Beldar is seen sucking into his mouth all of the toilet paper off the roll in the bathroom, and sampling the taste of the soap. Prymaat is on the vibrating bed, which causes the soles of her boots to illuminate.

With the Clorhones now residing somewhere in the New York City area, Beldar becomes an appliance repairman, clad in work clothes which include denim overalls and a naugahyde apron. At one point, Beldar ducks out to their trailer for lunch, "sears the top of [his] neck hole" with a hot slice of pizza (notwithstanding a warning about the possibility from Prymaat) and cools it down by spraying some Windex into his mouth, causing it to emit a mysterious vapor.

Beldar's and Prymaat's undocumented-alien status is revealed when Beldar quotes a made-up-on-the-fly "Social Security Number", with the wrong number of digits, and including a decimal point, to his boss, Otto (Sinbad).

Otto gets Beldar and Prymaat false identities and backgrounds from a local Identity forger, Carmine Weiner (Adam Sandler). Seated at a restaurant table, Weiner gives Beldar a 9" x 12" envelope containing forged identity documents--most particularly a Social Security Card--and goes over the fabricated details of each of Beldar's and Prymaat's new fictitious identities. Beldar is now "Donald R. DeCicco", and Prymaat is now "Mary Margaret Rowney", who met and became college sweethearts while "Donald DeCicco" was attending Hobart College.

Beldar's use of the forged documents is flagged in the computer database of the INS (now known as the USCIS). "That's the tenth job he's [DeCicco's] taken this month," comments Seedling.

Riding in Otto's car, Otto gives Beldar a quick primer on getting by in America. "Look good," Otto says, "be your own boss. Never get chained to a desk. And in business, take cash only." Beldar is chewing on and blowing up a condom, and offers one to Otto to chew, which Otto declines as something he shouldn't be doing while driving. Otto tells Beldar "you have got to do something about those teeth!"

Beldar sees a dentist (Jon Lovitz), and, at the request of the dentist to "open, please" dislocates his jaw to allow the dentist to cap all of his several rows of pointed teeth. Because of Beldar's hugely-disjointed jaw, the dentist is unable to properly administer gas anesthesia, since the entire mask fits inside of Beldar's mouth with room to spare. Beldar, however, enjoys the aroma of the gas, and inhales deeply.

Ambitious Immigration and Naturalization Service agent Gorman Seedling (Michael McKean) and his sycophantic assistant, Eli Turnbull (David Spade), make several unsuccessful attempts to apprehend Beldar and Prymaat. The first one forces Beldar and Prymaat to hastily abandon their trailer in the lot behind Otto's.

Seedling and Turnbull discover and examine Beldar's and Prymaat's Remulakian uniforms. Turnbull mistakes them for "Mardi Gras suits". Another agent discovers a Spacecraft safety card with Remulakian text on it, and a key fob depicting the aligned Remulakian moons.

Prymaat informs Beldar she is "with Cone". The Clorhones are able to use the communications device Beldar assembles with appropriated parts from Otto's workbench supplies. Upon reaching communication with their home planet, the Clorhones are told by Marlax Zanthstrom (Phil Hartman) that a rescue starship will not arrive for many years ("seven Zerls").

Despite their odd appearance and nasal voices, the Clorhones seek to blend in with human society. Beldar and Prymaat resettle as tenants and with Beldar as an employee in the basement of the home of an immigrant family engaged in the business of taxi-driving. Over time, while Beldar "works nights", resulting in Beldar's "guzz deprivation" by working through his "slaar phase". Prymaat saves the couple's money, intended for a down payment on a modest suburban home.

Prymaat's rupture of the membranes occurs--a massive amount of fluid rushes onto the floor and out the basement door--and observed by Khoudri, Beldar's employer, from the top of the basement stairs. At the hospital, Beldar, Khoudri and Otto attend the delivery. Otto records the event with a digital video camera. Khoudri and Otto get splashed with some kind of liquid associated with the birth, which seems to distress them.

It appears to be a normal delivery, except that Prymaat's hospital bed bounces up and down, and Prymaat's Cone furrows along its entire length with perspiration. After their daughter Connie's birth, they adopt the surname "Conehead", purchase the home they've been wanting, and move to suburban Paramus, New Jersey.

Beldar opens a business called "Meepzor Driving Academy", a driving school Beldar advertises in the yellow pages, using his own Mercury Sable to operate it. In one particularly poignant scene, Prymaat is grocery shopping with her friend and next-door neighbor (Lisa Jane Persky), and sees eggplants on display. Prymaat wails in dismay at the sight of the eggplants, until Prymaat picks one up to examine it, whereupon Prymaat chuckles a relieved nasal chuckle. Prymaat later intriguedly picks up some eggs and examines them.

Meanwhile, Seedling terminates his pursuit of the Coneheads. The case is now known as the "DeCicco case", and Seedlings termination of his pursuit of it comes after his getting a promotion. However, an inquiry by a U.S. Senator (Kevin Nealon), citing the heavy expense, demands that the case be properly concluded.

The now-teenaged Conjaab "Connie" Conehead (Michelle Burke), who has grown up among Earth's norms and American culture, wants to fit in with her peers. Her father Beldar greatly objects to certain behaviors by Conjaab, such as when when Connie "decorates her Cone" with a butterfly decal. Connie also wears makeup that Beldar refers to as "too much lip-and-cheek enhancement" that makes her "look like a common flathrag on payday".

To top it all off, much to Beldar's dismay, Connie begins seeing auto mechanic Ronnie Bradford (Chris Farley). Beldar had complained about Ronnie's dilatory approach to repairing Beldar's car by exclaiming "...it is as if you have seized me at the base of my snarglies!"

Connie shares her immigrant-parent experiences with Ronnie, who is also descended from immigrant parents from the "old country". When Connie asks "...which one?", Ronnie replies "I don't know. One of the larger ones."

Connie proceeds to impress Ronnie with her Remulakian eating abilities (known among Beldar and Prymaat with reverence as the "consumption of mass quantities") consuming an entire foot-long Subway submarine sandwich in one gulp. Ronnie exclaims "my Mom's the only other woman I know who could take a sandwich like that! You're something special."

Beldar, Prymaat and Connie live next door to Larry Farber (Jason Alexander) and Lisa Farber (Lisa Jane Persky). Beldar plays golf with Larry Farber, who wears a toupee. The couples are friends other than just golf.

At one point, in the men's locker room, Beldar's golfing buddies kid him about his chances of winning the club championship golf tournament. They peer with wonder at Beldar's lack of buttock cleavage and two flesh protrusions on his lower back.

Later, Beldar and Larry are seated at the bar, Larry with a regular pint glass beer stein in front of him, and Beldar with a ridiculously-large glass beer stein that appears to contain about two liters of beer. Beldar looks lovingly at the championship trophy, the trophy player's head growing a cone as he envisions himself the winner.

One afternoon, Beldar assists Larry, who is having difficulty getting his gas lawnmower started. Beldar recognizes it as an "standard three-horsepower internal-combustion chlorophyll-stalk slicer" and inquires "...there is...fuel...in the device?" "Yeah, there's plenty of gas," Larry replies, "I just can't get the damn thing to kick over." Beldar unscrews the sparkplug and places it in his mouth. He rinses it throroughly with the Remulakian equivalent of saliva. Beldar screws the sparkplug back into the mower, pulls the cord, and the engine turns over immediately. "Thanks, Bels," says Larry.

Meanwhile, Prymaat and Lisa are commiserating. "Excellent crop of decorative growth! Perhaps you'll join us for consumption of mass quantities," Prymaat says. "We will ignite our new flame pit and char some mammal flesh for you." Lisa responds, "That sounds like fun. I'll make coleslaw." Prymaat looks off into the distance, with reverence. "Ahh, 'coleslaw'. We will enjoy it."

Gorman and Eli track the Coneheads to their Paramus home. They attempt a more direct approach, posing as Jehovah's Witnesses. They surreptitiously gain entry to the Coneheads' home under false pretenses, in violation of the Fourth Amendment (among others).

Beldar and Prymaat describe themselves as French and converse with Seedling in perfect French. Beldar, Prymaat and Connie are dressed for a country club costume party.

To appear as a "bluntskull", Beldar disguises his Cone with a Lincolnesque stovepipe hat and neckbeard. Prymaat disguises her Cone as a lipstick, and Connie conceals her Cone with a Disney Princess-type decorative pointed hat. Connie is excited to be attending with Ronnie, who is attired in a James Dean costume.

During the conversation, in which Beldar falsely tells Seedling that they are American citizens now, Seedling breaks character to demand "do you have proof?" They are interrupted by what they describe as the phone ringing, which Beldar asks Prymaat to answer.

Prymaat discovers that the sound is their Remulakian communication device, and Prymaat says hurriedly to Beldar, "no, Beldar, the big phone!" Beldar alertly ejects Seedling and Turnbull promptly. Beldar is notified by Marlax of their approaching and Remulakian rescue starship, set to arrive that very night.

After Connie is told of their imminent rescue, she informs her parents she wants to stay on Earth with Ronnie. Learning that their friends the Coneheads will be moving away, Larry comments "I guess when you get the call to be the driver for the President of France, you've gotta go." An INS contingent arrives at the Coneheads' home on a cul-de-sac to arrest the Coneheads. Seedling smugly waves his INS badge at them as he approaches.

Ronnie helps stall the agents, yelling out of the rear window of a INS government vehicle that he loves Connie. The Remulakian rescue starship arrives just in time. Gorman leaps at the last second to grab the car's rear tire, and Eli, calling out to Seedling, grabs on to Seedling's feet. Seedling and Turnbull are, along with the spacecraft-grappled car, taken aboard the Remulakian vessel with the Coneheads.

On Remulak, Beldar is welcomed home. Beldar presents the Highmaster with various Earthly 'gifts', such as a four-way tire iron, what Beldar says is "an owner's manual or a Ford-Lincoln Mercury Sable." The Highmaster inquires, "A Ford-Lincoln Mercury Sable?" Beldar replies, "a personal conveyance named for its inventor, an assassinated ruler, a creature of Greco-Roman myth, and a small fur-covered mammal."

Beldar's gifts include Gorman and Eli as slaves. Initially satisfied with Beldar's accomplishments, Mintot (Dave Thomas) notices that Beldar's sharp teeth have been capped--as Otto had advised Beldar to do, in order to blend in. Mintot accuses him of treasonous alteration of his "trelgs". He sentences him to fight the ferocious Garthok (known as "narfling the Garthak", which greatly distresses Prymaat.

After the Garthak easily and gruesomely kills other condemned individuals, Beldar, singing Soft Cell's "Tainted Love", uses his Earthly golfing skills. Beldar hits a rock into the Garthok's mouth, causing it to choke and lay prostrate on the ground of the "narfling maze", certainly disabled, if not dead.

The Highmaster pardons Beldar and accedes to Beldar's request to return to Earth with Gorman as Beldar's prisoner. Eli stays behind and becomes Mintot's new flunky. Beldar departs for Earth with Prymaat and Connie, and with Seedling in a special liquid-filled cylinder, in their attack starship.

Beldar realizes his love for his daughter should accede to Connie's feelings in opposition of the planetary conquest mission. Beldar fabricates, over the comms, an Earth attack. Beldar warns the invasion force of non-existent Earth weapons, and orders his invasion force to retreat and proceed to their secondary target in another part of the galaxy. Beldar makes it appear that a superior weapon has destroyed his starship.

As a reward for rescuing him, Seedling agrees to give the Coneheads green cards, Seedling conceding that Beldar has exceptional skills no American has. Ronnie takes Connie to their senior prom while the Conehead family settles down to a happy life on their adopted planet of Earth.

Cast

• Dan Aykroyd as Beldar Clorhone (later Conehead) / Donald R. DeCicco
• Jane Curtin as Prymaat Clorhone (later Conehead) / Mary Margaret Rowney
• Michelle Burke as Conjaab "Connie" Clorhone/Conehead
• Danielle Aykroyd as 3-year-old Connie
• Michael McKean as INS Deputy Commissioner Gorman Seedling, the main antagonist of the film
• David Spade as INS Agent Eli Turnbull
• Chris Farley as Ronnie Bradford
• Sinbad as Otto
• Michael Richards as Arnold
• Eddie Griffin as Raymond
• Phil Hartman as Marlax Zanthstrom
• Adam Sandler as Carmine Weiner
• Mitchell Bobrow as Tanner
• Jason Alexander as Larry Farber
• Lisa Jane Persky as Lisa Farber
• Dave Thomas as Highmaster Mintot
• Laraine Newman as Laarta, Prymaat's sister, Marlax's wife and Connie's aunt
• Garrett Morris as Captain Orecruiser
• Drew Carey as Manny Manson
• Kevin Nealon as Kevin
• Jan Hooks as Gladys Johnson
• Parker Posey as Stephanie
• Joey Lauren Adams as Christina
• Julia Sweeney as Principal Eva Sweeney
• Ellen DeGeneres as Coach Rosa Scott
• Tim Meadows as Condemned Conehead #1
• Tom Davis as Condemned Conehead #2
• Peter Aykroyd as Highmaster's Aide
• Jonathan Penner as Air Traffic captain
• Whip Hubley as F-16 pilot
• Mark Fulton (uncredited) as Toni
• Jon Lovitz (uncredited) as Dr. Rudolph, dentist
• Tom Arnold (uncredited) as Tommy

In addition to Jane Curtin appearing as a regular cast member, Jan Hooks, Phil Hartman, Julia Sweeney, Kevin Nealon, and Laraine Newman all appeared as guest stars on 3rd Rock from the Sun, which was created by Coneheads co-writers Bonnie and Terry Turner and featured a similar premise of aliens making efforts to assimilate into American society. Additionally, co-writer Terry Turner cameos in the film as the sketch artist that Seedling describes Beldar to.

Michelle Burke, Parker Posey, and Joey Lauren Adams would all appear in Dazed and Confused, which was released 2 months after Coneheads.

Production

Tom Davis, who created the characters on Saturday Night Live, wrote the first version of the screenplay. He was unhappy with choices made by the producers, including setting the Remulak scenes in a gladiators' arena, rather than the suburban environment that he envisioned.

While there are some differences, Coneheads mostly follows the same plot as in the animated special that was created ten years earlier. Similarities include the Coneheads being stranded on Earth, Beldar working as an appliance repair man, and Connie dating an earthling named Ronnie.

The film mostly takes place in Paramus, New Jersey. Some scenes were filmed in New York City and the New Jersey towns of Jersey City and Wrightstown.

Reception

The film debuted at No. 6 on its opening weekend, while its domestic box office grossed $7,100,501. By the end of its domestic theatrical run, the film had grossed $21,074,717.

Coneheads received generally negative reviews from critics. The review aggregator website Rotten Tomatoes gives the film a low score of 35%, based on 31 reviews with a consensus that reads, "Listless, crude, and overall uninspired, Coneheads offers further evidence that stretching an SNL sketch to feature length can be tougher than narfling a garthok." Metacritic, which uses a weighted average, assigned the film a score of 49 out of 100, based on 20 critics, indicating "mixed or average" reviews. Audiences surveyed by CinemaScore gave the film a grade of "B+" on scale of A+ to F.

Roger Ebert gave the film 1+1⁄2 stars out of 4, describing Coneheads as "dismal, dreary and fairly desperate" and the actors as unable to overcome an uninspired screenplay. Janet Maslin of The New York Times said the film "has its dopey charms", and that it is suitable for people who found Wayne's World too demanding.

The Los Angeles Times called it "an unusually companionable jape; in this world it makes perfect sense that the Coneheads' friends and neighbors never really register that there's anything terribly different about them. They're all-American eccentrics—even if they happen to come from the planet Remulak".

The film received some critical re-evaluation during the 2010s, with multiple writers noting its satirical take on an immigrant family experience and immigration enforcement (meant as an exaggeration of Reagan-era politics) became eerily politically relevant following the September 11 attacks.

Book tie-in

A movie tie-in book entitled The Life and Times of Beldar Conehead, as Told to Gorman Seedling, I.N.S. Commissioner, Retired was published in 1993. The book provides an interesting look into the backstory of Beldar and Prymaat Conehead, as well as of the planet Remulak.

Soundtrack

Coneheads: Music from the Motion Picture Soundtrack
Soundtrack album by Various Artists
Released	July 20, 1993 (1993-07-20)
Recorded	1992–1993
Genre	Soundtrack
Length	43:27
Label	Warner Bros. Records
Producer	Various Artists
Singles from Coneheads: Music from the Motion Picture Soundtrack
"Soul to Squeeze" Released: August 19, 1993

Professional ratings

Review scores
Source	Rating
AllMusic	link
Music Week

The soundtrack for Coneheads was released on July 20, 1993, by Warner Bros. Records. It features the songs "Tainted Love" by Soft Cell, "It's a Free World, Baby" by R.E.M. and "Soul to Squeeze" by the band Red Hot Chili Peppers which would go on to reach 22 on the US Billboard Hot 100. The album itself would peak at 162 on the US Billboard 200 chart.

Track listing

No.	Title	Performed by	Length
1.	"Magic Carpet Ride" (originally performed by Steppenwolf)	Michael Monroe and Slash	3:40
2.	"Tainted Love"	Soft Cell	2:42
3.	"No More Tears (Enough Is Enough)" (originally performed by Barbra Streisand and Donna Summer)	Andy Bell and k.d. lang	3:51
4.	"Kodachrome"	Paul Simon	3:30
5.	"Can't Take My Eyes Off You" (originally performed by Frankie Valli)	Morten Harket	3:43
6.	"It's a Free World, Baby"	R.E.M.	5:12
7.	"Soul to Squeeze"	Red Hot Chili Peppers	4:52
8.	"Fight the Power" (originally performed by Public Enemy)	Barenaked Ladies	4:05
9.	"Little Renee"	Digable Planets	3:22
10.	"Chale Jao"	Babble	4:10
11.	"Conehead Love featuring Beldar and Prymaat"	Nan Schaefer, Bruce Gowdy, and Peter Aykroyd	4:05
Total length:			43:27

None of David Newman's score was included on the above album, but it was issued on a 2015 Intrada album paired with his scores for Talent for the Game and Itsy Bitsy Spider.

External links

• Coneheads at IMDb
• Coneheads at Box Office Mojo
• Coneheads at Rotten Tomatoes